As part of his Page 2 column on ESPN.com, DJ Gallo wrote an article satirizing Forbes Magazine’s “Most Livable Places in America” by putting a sports spin on it. Here’s what he had to say about Detroit.
Verdict: Unlivable. It’s good Jim Leyland can’t smoke anymore. If the Tigers caught on fire, Detroit would have nothing left.
Livable: Well, the Tigers are off to a fairly good start. And you and a few friends could always buy an arena and live in it if you wanted to. That’s extremely livable.
Unlivable: The Red Wings’ run might be over. The Pistons stink. And the Lions remain nothing to get aroused about, regardless of Jim Schwartz’s tastes in tailbacks. When things used to be bad in Detroit, you could always escape west to Ann Arbor and the success of University of Michigan athletics. Not anymore. Now it’s probably best to go east and just walk into the depths of Lake St. Clair.